Oh yes, well worth buying in Bangkok are goods from the tailors, but there are definite differences in the quality. My favourite tailor is Gulati, Sukhumvit Soi 3. Is directly on the corner opposite the „NANA“. That’s where you can get fantastic made to measure shirts for about 600 Baht a piece (after haggling, of course he asks for more at first), a suit costs between 4000 and 6000 Baht depending on the material. All my mates, many expats, all have their clothes made there, and nowhere else.

It’s like this: All the tailors in Thailand are completely controlled by Indians, and those who do the actual work over night are always the same people (Thais), they mainly work for a number of contractors, but this one here really does good work. If there is something wrong then complain, alterations will be completed by the next day. So, were the hell else can one get a made to measure shirt for 12 Euros? In stores at home you will only get a couple of cheap T-shirts for that price and then only during a sales… have to go down there two or three times for a sitting when ordering a suit, to try it on to make sure it fits etc.

And the two beauty salons between Sukhumvit Soi 5 and 7 are also worth while visiting – this is part of the stretch I have to get through during a visit to Bangkok. At this place one only has to fork out 500 Baht for fingers, feet and hair, there are three nice girls who get to work on you, which means one is able to leave the place completely done up after about only 30 to 40 minutes, holiday time is valuable
 

The hustling street “Sanam Luang” near Lumpini Park is an address sometimes recommended, but not all that good if one speaks no Thai and has no car, in fact not even then really (such as I once discovered with my mate from Jomtien).
 

Finally I would like to mention Pantip Plaza, that’s where I like to buy music CDs (current music, mp3) for 100 Baht per CD. See the picture gallery on the previous page.

With a friend who lives in Pattaya who was in BKK with his own car, we had a trip through Bangkok. We went down Lumpini Park and Sanam Luang where the pros walk the street. To make things short, the evening was a waste of time. Something from the dairy:

I met S. we drove down to Sanam Luang and to Lumpini. S first of all lived in the Playboy hotel and found it ok. We dragged a couple of hens along from Lumpini, that was a waste of time! They wanted to take the piss. In the hotel mine said that she wanted the money first, I laughed and phoned S. He had the same problem. Quick meeting in the hotel corridor… Suddenly they both said that they would have to leave at 5 in the morning but we had booked them for LT, the reason being they had to go to school.

These two hadn’t seen a school in a long time and that was for sure. One started blabbering on about her “boyfriend”(of course I couldn’t understand a thing so S translated), which earned us the laughter from one of the hotel employees who was just passing by. So, right from the very start they hadn’t wanted LT, just the doe and after a quick screw, off and away. Even our offer of ST for half the price was turned down – anyway with payment afterwards. This resulted in them having to travel back at their own cost without receiving a single Baht from us. Obviously they seem to have some success with this trick.

We then went down to the NANA, we both had a hen sitting next to us, and funnily enough they both had the same name. Technically speaking, mine wasn’t really my taste, (she was just 18 and new to the business), we decided to swap girls. Things worked out well with these two. I gave mine 1100 for ST plus a 100 tip and even picked her up at 2 in the morning for LT and gave her another 1100 Baht. To stay with the topic, I booked her for both the last two days, altogether for the two days I paid 3000 (1 LT and the following day only ST) plus 2 times 500 BF. She’s 21, was a bit shy at first (pics as from the second day, no vids), but made me shoot my load twice during the first ST – I had actually wanted to save some – For the street walkers.

Well! Did actually land in NANA again, down with the street walkers is not recommendable for short trip tourists like myself, first of all because one should be able to speak Thai, ok, one could have a bit of luck. But why look so far when good things are right next door? She was really a sweet little thing, sometimes a bit melancholic, but nice and she had a good heart… During the evening she dragged me down to a huge Karaoke Bar in region where she came from. The pictures didn’t turn out that good, was too dark. Ordered a bite to eat, a bottle of Thai whiskey, Coca Cola and ice. Thai-like again. Was very nice and not too expensive, I was the only Farang.

Bangkok is the capital city of one of the most up-coming cities in South East Asia with money ruling the world. So who could be surprised that people with more money than time meet up here? It’s not the “14 day” type tourists who travel to Pattaya or to one of the islands, but more the “business man” type from all over the world… They only have a little bit of time so the quick type of fun is sought. No time for selecting and haggling, a few thousand Baht is no problem at all, why should it be when the same service in New York, Tokio or Berlin costs a number of times as what it costs here?
 

So, what does that result in? Of course, prices increase and the girl’s attitude to the service deteriorates. Why make such an effort for little cash when there is more money about for little work?
 

That’s where the colleagues get it wrong, they reckon if one pays more, then one will automatically receive a better performance and more exclusivity, these are the ones who consider themselves to be something better and don’t want anything to do with the mean sex tourists. As I said, wrong, the bar girls’ logic tells them that whoever is so stupid to pay the price asked can also be treated in such a manner, so, the service deteriorates instead of getting better. The only thing I can say about exclusivity is that it’s always the same girls on the game with the same background, the same origin and the same education and standard of knowledge. This is ok because I just want fun with the girls, I can get enough of profound conversation about the meaning of life and god and the world, about the emancipation of women etc. etc. at home. Nobody needs that, and here least of all.
 

It’s exactly like that – more money than time. What can one expect from such a fucked up scene? That a 20 year old cutie offers a 24 hour a day girlfriend sex service for 500 Baht? Not really, maybe in Pattaya whereby the 500 Baht was not really meant seriously (well, not any more).
 

If some tosser is stupid enough to pay 5000 Baht for a bout of short-time and whilst doing so gets the piss taken out of him, it would not be fair to hold it against the girls. It’s quite logical really that they claim that “Farang are rich and stupid” and the worse thing about it is that in general they are right. See, there we are again!
 

Some prats even believe that if they pay more (I mean too much) then they are respected by the chicks. The truth is that it’s quite the opposite. It’s like this: The prat voluntary pays many times the normal price without even haggling so I can carry on taking the piss when in the hotel. Then there is the thing with the towel, TV, mobile, prick too big and ow – ow – ow (it hurts), after about 10 minutes of lying around without really taking part it’s important that she leaves because the baby is waiting, granny is ill or it’s her brother’s birthday.
 

Of course the fee is paid as well, the whole lot, one isn’t a miser and apart from that everything is just so cheap. The whole lot would have cost a lot more back at home! So one or the other 1000 Baht tip is given with pleasure, of course because one just has to feel sorry for the girl because of her job and the other dirty sex tourists are so mean and exploit the poor thing. And apart from all that, the water buffalo was recently hit by lightning and the roof of the house is leaking because it was damaged during the last storm, etc. etc. etc.
 

The true reason for all the goodness is that the prat hasn’t got an arse in his trousers and just cannot say “NO”, what a poor bastard.
 

The next morning during breakfast he tells all his mates about what a fantastic night he had.
 

WHAT???
 

Oh yes, the famous Beer garden down Soi 7… Not really the place for me in Bangkok because personally I have never dragged a chick along with me from here… One will mainly find older women with a horrifying imagination of the price and performance, nobody needs anything like that. Maybe I have never really taken a good look around the place or have just had bad luck. Anyway, take a look for yourselves because many have a lot of good to say about this place and the scene is quite interesting for those just wanting to observe.

Of course one shouldn’t have a bad deal in Bangkok! The “DEMONIA” down the Sukhumvit Soi 33 (where the so called “Art Bars” are to be found) had more to offer earlier on. During the good times this is a place where one was able to experience quite a lot – take a look at the homepage, (link at the top). It works like this: The first drink costs 900 Baht, as from the second drink 300 Baht. For this, one is provided with quite a bit of (more or less personal) a show, SM performance, not hard but quite nice. Does make one horny though. They thrash each other’s back sides, one is also able to take part if one wants to. Wax, whip, masks and the appropriate costume.

In the meantime the bar is controlled by the police (a few time a day) quite often meaning that not all that much really happens in the bar these days. Of course one is able to pay for one of the girls and drag her along for a bit of fun, but that’s not all that cheap either.

Once (during the time when there were no controls) I waited until the bar closed for the night and took four chicks along with me for a small private party in my hotel. Up until then we had quite a bit of fun at the bar. They shoved a “mask-dildo” up their fannies, tied me to a cross, gave me a blowjob etc. All this was done in the bar, except for shoving “it” in (well not officially anyway).

Afterwards as already mentioned we went off down to my hotel (here the Omni Tower) for the party…

…was nice! Whilst waiting for them to finish their shower and put on their outfits, which some had actually brought along with them and others using those available here, I lay on the bed and supped a beer, smoked a stogie and just waited for what was coming to me. We played a few dildo, lick and blowjob games. At some time or other I shot into two of the chicks gobs. After a couple of hours I sent the troop home.

Something I would never have guessed before: The most fun I ever had in Bangkok was actually in Patpong… I always thought that the place was only interesting for the catalogue tourists, Japanese and newcomers, but that’s not true at all. The three remaining blowjob bars “Star of Light, Rose and Kangaroo still offer a few good possibilities. One is also able to hire the service personnel for certain parties, even though some night-watchmen dub one to be a “filthy pig”. I myself would never have had the idea of seriously investigating Patpong as a possibility of having fun with all those rip-off Gogos and terrible upstairs bars. Well, not until a Bangkok expat showed me the ropes. This happened a few years ago now (and changed my life), but in general things are just the same these days.
 

To get to Patpong from the Sukhumvit Road it is best to catch the sky-train (BTS), for example from the station at the „NANA“ or the “ASOKE” (Soi Cowboy) down to the “SALA DAENG” station. The trip costs 25 Baht and even though one has to change trains once the journey only takes a few minutes (the trains travel at one minute intervals). The train is safe and fully acclimatised. I will go into more detail about the sky-train, which was built by Siemens, later on.
 

Of course if one wishes one can travel by taxi, that’s if one is too lazy to go down to the BTS station. The trip with the taxi costs 50 Baht. Another method is taking a motorbike-taxi, which is recommendable if traffic only consists of traffic jams. The trip with a motorbike-taxi will cost about 70 to 80 Baht but in general is not all that safe at all, the drivers ride like madmen. Be careful on the way back, if one takes a taxi directly from Patpong most of them will want 100 Baht even though they are supposed to switch on the meter. Make sure they use the taximeter, if they don’t then get out of the taxi and walk for about 100 metres in the direction of travel; it will then be possible to get one without being ripped off. They do that sort of thing with tourist at certain points around Bangkok, they wouldn’t dare trying it out on a Thai. By the way, a tip for the taxi driver is something unknown; take a look at the chapter “Travelling with taxis in Bangkok” on the “News from Bangkok” CD.
 

If one happens to arrive at Patpong during the early afternoon there will be nothing to see of the glitter and glamour. Everything seems to be more dismal than adventurous. But there are a few good locations for a bit of fun. I usually visit one of the blowjob bars and hire myself a few girls to take back to my hotel room (or to a short-time hotel close by) for a bit of a party. Recently I deliberately took a stroll around to take a look at other things than I already knew of… There are quite a few massage parlours and quite a few tarts roaming around (take a look at the photo) looking for fresh “victims”. I let myself be dragged into a massage parlour, was quite nice but not brilliant. The two chicks were a bit too cool for my liking and didn’t really have their mind on the job. 
 

In places such as “Lift” or “Sisters” it possible to have a bit of fun, I just took a quick look, let them show me a few of the girls but there wasn’t anything I fancied there that day, nothing I wasn’t able to find close by and maybe even better.

Not too long ago I had paid another visit to the “Kangaroo Bar”. I had just arrived on the plane from Phnom Penh and was pretty horny. Got chatting to the next best “artist”, ordered myself a beer and a lady-drink for her. She got “it” out and gave me a blowjob at the bar, pretty much a standard thing in this place, after all, the cops cannot race up the stairs as fast as the bell is rung downstairs, which is a signal for her to pull my prick out of her gob.

After about five minutes I took her into the “conservatory” (separated from the rest of the bar by a pane of glass) and got my end away, first of all on the bar stool then doggy fashion, I let her keep her skirt on. As I have already mentioned I was extremely horny, after a few minutes I shot my load. Didn’t really take a very good look at the tart in the dim light but that doesn’t matter anyway, the screw was great, cost me 1000 Baht with a tip and a drink.

The Kangaroo Bar is still ok. The “Rose Bar” is still a blowjob bar, one has to go upstairs here as well, things can still be arranged here but most of the girls are more like zombies. With a bit of luck though one may manage to find something a little decent, just go in and take a look around yourself.
 

Then there is the “Star of Light”, ground floor bar, the police gave them a hell of a lot of trouble. First of all the ST room had to go (was a bit of a shoebox, apart from myself only a maximum of three chicks fitted in there meaning that each new position had to be planned carefully due to the lack of room), then unfortunately, unfortunately and once again unfortunately, the fantastic curtain under the bar had to go, the one where one could sit and get a blowjob whilst supping ones beer. Now one can only get a blowjob on a stool or in the bogs, not that this bothers me all that much, but I don’t come all that quickly and the whole procedure takes place in a bit of a hurry. 
 

This bar is good for hiring chicks, they do absolutely everything one wants. Hiring fee 400 Baht, for a bout of short-time (2-3 hours) one has to pay 1000 Baht. It is well worth taking a few along from this place, they really do know what they are doing. Another thing, one doesn’t have to be worried about being ripped off in any of the bars just mentioned. They don’t ask for all that many lady-drinks, the prices are at a fixed rate and are ok and the bill is always correct.
 

The “Star of Love” is a place of the past, a pity really; they have just got a lot stricter, which in Thailand can vary from district to district. From a political point of view the government is at fault for these “unpleasant customs”, we will just have to wait and see what the new government does.
 

A quick comment on the side, that’s it with blowjob bars in Bangkok, unfortunately the old “Lolitas” down the Soi Cowboy is now a car park and as far as I am concerned the other “Lolitas” down the Sukhumvit Soi 8 is a load of crap.
 

More Patpong:
 

Well, what else have we got? During the evening there are of course the sales stalls with the usual bits and pieces for the catalogue tourists and backpackers, there is also a large Foodland supermarket (open 24 hours a day) and loads of restaurants. Above all there are the large Gogo Bars such as “Kings Castle” etc. Caution, it’s here that they once put 1000 Baht too much on my bill. In general one is warned about paying a visit “upstairs” – one has to go up the stairs were among other things there are shows being performed. This place is a rip-off; one is in fact ripped off something rotten so keep away. Once again, the “Kangaroo” and “Rose” are not like this, they are absolutely correct.
 

Of course there are ladyboys in Patpong, the red-headed colleague is a nice example. The kathoys in some of the Gogos are extremely good looking.
 

The “BarBar” (nice homepage) in Patpong is worth paying a visit to if one is a friend of the more “intensive” type of fun.
Caution, “filthy pig” Alarm!!!
 

This is a sadomasochism bar similar to the dump down Soi 33. The only difference is that they have less trouble with the police here. Earlier on the “BarBar” was on the ground floor but nowadays the ground floor is occupied by a small bar with dancing poles. The actual BDSM bar has been moved up to the first floor with the old system being put to use, quite clever really. If the police actually do happen to control the place (by the way the guests don’t have anything to worry about) the doorman presses the appropriate button and an alarm is set off upstairs. In such cases forbidden activities are interrupted immediately. It’s like this in all Gogo Bars where girls dance naked; after all this sort of thing is strictly forbidden in Thailand.
 

More photos from around Patpong below: I took the pics of the ladies with the – very charming as far as I am concerned – view from behind in the bar. Unfortunately I don’t have any other pics of life inside the bar. There is a metal frame there, “torturing tools” and a school bench etc.etc. Take a look at the homepage. The last time I was there I had about four girls sat around me all supping a lady-drink. There was also a girl acting like a dog, she was barking and whining and crawling about on all fours, she also wanted a drink but I told her no and to the others amusement said something like “not you dog, sit down and shut up”.
 

After some time I was more or less ready for a short-time, this together with three or four whores of my choice (high prices, the more one takes with one the cheaper it gets for each tart) because I had been promised quite a bit of swinishness. Curiously enough this dream didn’t come true because of the Mamasan.
 

This is what happened: After letting the chicks know what I was expecting on this day, they served me with a long drink of the special kind for “testing purposes”. A large glass of “natural bubbly” (piss) “tapped” from various sources there and then right in front of my eyes, the whole thing on ice, I had never had it with ice before, a premiere, delicious.
 

I sipped away at my “piss on the rocks” and drunk a toast with the girls. The Mamasan turned up and said that it couldn’t be true that guests were given free drinks and told me to pay for the drink. After quite a discussion I was so angry that I forgot about everything, paid my bill and left the place, of course, now more than ever, not before finishing off my “free drink”.
 

Well honestly lads, one really can exaggerate things when money grabbing, or what do you think? The Mamasan messed up business for the girls as well, own fault though.