Thai food: all pictures made in Bangkog.

It’s not for no reason at all that Thai food is probably considered to be the best in the world. Those who don’t like it see things, rightfully, a different way. Those who go about things with their senses “open minded” so to say, will be delighted. I just cannot believe that there are actually people who visit Thailand and only eat hamburgers and schnitzel, but unfortunately this has to be seen as a fact. I myself have also sat in the beer garden down Soi 7 or in the “German Brauhaus” down Soi 11 and ordered a German meal, why not if one is craving for something like that? But whether that is always a good thing is anyone’s guess.
The ingredients, which are always fresh, are treated correctly in the Thai kitchen, this means not “cooked to death” but done properly, done meaning that the texture, aroma and goodness is retained. Food is mainly cooked in a wok, simmered or sautéed. Things are a lot easier with the Thais serving everything to fit the size of the mouth, small pieces cook faster. The ingredients of a meal are put together in a nutrition-technically and tastefully balanced manner. It doesn’t always have to be a huge piece of meat with the rest plonked around it as some sort of a side order.

The versatile way of preparing a meal and numerous interesting spices and herbs are all put to use in their own way… Everything around just fits perfectly, in fact in such a way that the best possible tastiness is drawn out of the meal.

I also find the sweet sour combination very interesting, something seldom produced in our kitchens. Unusual are the typical spices and herbs such as lemon grass and Thai-basil. I suppose that the list of all the things used here to give a meal that “Aha” experience never really ends.

Sometimes some meals are quite hot and spicy. On first eating Thai food (of course in Thailand, it doesn’t taste all that good here in Europe, well, I don’t think so anyway) I already had my own opinion, which was that it is hot and spicy and only troubles the tongue, in fact I thought that the hot and spicy bit just dominates the actual taste of it. This is all wrong of course such as I was to find out. Eating hot and spicy meals has become a part of my life and is a new experience, which I just wouldn’t like to miss any more.

Nowadays I sometimes copy the girls I saw during my first visit to Thailand, I saw them sitting at a table in Phuket making strange hissing noises. At the time I thought this was due to the horny effect I had on the girls, haha, but now I know it had to do with the food they were eating. I am absolutely certain it had to do with the omnipresent Som Tam, which can be very hot and spicy.

I have discovered something with the hot and spicy, which I would like to point out here. It has to do with “Pic”, the small extremely hot red and green chillies. And also “Sai Krock”, these are the fat and a bit sour tasting sausages from the Isaan. If I eat such a sausage without anything else at all or a side dish, then I feel full for the rest of the day with the taste making me feel queasy. If I eat one of these chillies on its own it will burn my tongue away. If I eat both together they seem to neutralise each other’s affect. So what do I do? I take a bite of sausage and at the same time shove a whole chilly into my gob; what an experience. The sausage doesn’t taste fatty and one can taste the chilly without it burning. This means that in between I am able to eat for example two Sai Krocks and 10 to 12 chillies. This is not hot at all or should I say not too hot.

It’s also possible to eat the sausage with a number of other things, I also know of the variation with ginger and/or garlic (whole cloves), also very delicious. Sometimes one is also given a portion of raw cabbage, fantastic!

Not a single holiday passes by without me getting to know a new dish and I take it that things will also remain this way with the variety of culinary experiences being extremely extensive.
 

So, the best thing to do is to try something new and if it doesn’t taste as nice as one expected then that’s no problem either because food here doesn’t cost all that much at all. Take a look at what the lady on the first picture conjured up for me – very delicious. I really haven’t got a clue what it is called, but I know it and will definitely order it again. The food stalls provide their meals in a plastic container, which allows one to take the meal to the next beer bar to be devoured.
 

Something else good and cheap that caught my attraction recently were the meals in Foodland down Soi 5. The place is open 24 hours a day 7 days a week. If one wants one can get food like its homemade but also Thai food, everything for just a few Baht. Of course at that price the place is always full. Even cheaper and even more typical is the restaurant down Pantip Plaza (that’s the computer, software and music sales temple). One has to purchase coupons at the till for about 100 Baht (make sure you can eat enough with the price of meals being so cheap) then place the order directly with one of the cooks. There is an unbelievably large choice of food and one is able to get ones money back for the coupons one has left over. 
 

There is a wide range of fruit on offer. A portion of “Teng Mo” (water melon) or “Saparot” (pineapple) costs 10 Baht. The fruit is a lot sweeter and more delicious than one can get at home. Freshly pressed orange juice (“Nam Som”) costs 25 Baht, a fresh cooled coconut (“Maprao”) costs 20 Baht.
 

The last photo was taken in Chinatown; the food looks a little different due to the influence of the Chinese. I personally don’t care much about crustaceans.

Got the traditional last ST of my holidays from the NANA. This one below was a real cracker. Met her on the day before last in the VODOO (NANA) Gogo, but she had her geezer from Stuttgart with her, pity. Agreed to a bit of ST the next day at short notice (last one of the holiday) The Farang checked out early the next evening and went off towards the airport. Here the corresponding extract from my diary:

Had 2 super parties in BKK, have written about one of them. Nights (about 3 in the morning) ordered a Thai massage in my hotel, 600 Baht, load of crap but she did a decent blow job – 1000. Then the 2^nd party on the last day. Got up at 11, finished something I wanted to do off quickly then off to Patpong. At 2 in the afternoon was sat in a taxi together with 3 hens, off to my hotel. They stared again in Playboy Hotel. Gave it rock all until 6 in the evening then packed my case and off to NANA for the ST appointment.

Oh man! What I experienced there again, I have always said, it’s a running game, if it’s not running very well, then it’s not running very well, if it’s running well then it’s running well. Hadn’t had that much of a good look at the girl in the poor light of the Gogo Bar, She had her LT Farang with her, (hello Stuttgart!!) she kept on groping about on me. At first only her teeth and face fascinated me, then I realised, she had a great figure. We met at 8.

She arrived at half 8, I’m telling you, what a little tigress! She had huge tits that felt really good (supposedly all genuine), her back side, I couldn’t believe it, so round, so beautiful, Oh man! And her waist, oh my God! They always say that Latinos have the better and more luscious figure, forget it. Her only minor faults are: She is already 25 (she says herself she is an old woman, but also thinks that young girls are no good, compared with her she was quite right). The second fault, the gut is going a bit (not that bad though), but apart from that it’s the first time I’m going to give the full 10 points. Her face, this wicked laugh, I thought, she’s a little devil, was right as well. What does my mate always say, “a devil recognises another by their gait”, how right!

She came straight up to me, a big hello. She had just got rid of her LT from Stuttgart. Told him that she didn’t want to accompany him to the airport, it would make her cry. The truth was she didn’t want to miss the appointment with me; he had given her 12000 for the 3 days, yeah well!

Drank a beer with her, she didn’t even bother to get changed; I paid the barfine. Beforehand I had made it clear where I wanted to shoot my load (right at the back of her tongue of course), she was a bit shocked at first. Hope the ST hotel is still in NANA, 3^rd floor. Shut, regards from Mr Taksin. We’re not going to let this bloke bugger things up for us. She asked the Mamasan, yes there is a possibility, I followed her outside, I’m quite eager to know where we’re going. We went up the left hand staircase to the second floor (meaning the one above the ground floor). From here, if one carries straight on, there is a staircase up to the third floor. At the moment on the left hand side of it there is some construction work being carried out. I can’t believe it, across the construction work over some dusty planks, past a cement mixer, up a further staircase. We have now reached the “reception”, a desk more or less slap bang in the middle of the construction work. 2 girls were sat there, I was handed the key and paid 300 Baht.

Off we go to the room. Everything is ok, towels, shower etc but primitive furnishing. We got undressed, God what a figure!! I told her to lie down on the bed and first of all completely licked her divine back side. That’s it. Then her fanny, by now she’s dripping like a gravel lorry. Her arsehole is so wide it’s no problem to push the index finger in as far as it will go, feels like a second fanny, second finger in the gap. She is really horny, just like myself, we give it all we’ve got. The whole thing was pleasurable for the both of us, had a few jokes, laughed a lot, we were just made for each other, everything fitted perfectly. We did all sorts of naughty thing, and as agreed upon beforehand, I shot my load on her stretched out tongue and in her face. Continuously took photos, she let me. After receiving the load in her mouth, she stayed for a while and sucked my vitamin-rich prick. Nice photos. 

We went to the bathroom, she washed her faced and subsequently had a pee. Or whatever you call it. She sits on the bog, I part her legs, hold a hand under. Remember? From Cuba, but this time without a sea urchin… She’s really up to scratch and is not inhibited. I wet her nipples with the hand and licked them clean, she liked that. Under the shower we talked about Germany (she’s visiting our area this month and said she wants to phone me, wonder if she does) and about the cost of things there, and the best way to bleed punters dry (I asked her why the bloke from Stuttgart didn’t send a bit of cash over each month, suggested a “sick mother”, she had to scream) etc.

I’m finished; the party at midnight was quite strenuous (just like in the good old days). Drank a couple more beers with her then with no time to spare back to the hotel, shower, checked out and off, life can be hard, but it was worth it. I was really lucky, normally doesn’t work out leaving things so late and by jumping in at the deep end. But this was great, gave her 2000 for the ST. Have never before, or since then, paid so much for a ST, but it was ok for her.

Couldn’t sort my thoughts out during the flight, too many, didn’t know where to start. The whole time I kept trying to sort them out, nice job for a lousy return flight to the heartless home country with a stopover in Kuwait lasting nearly five hours…

A further topic. If one takes heed of the few basic rules, nothing can really go wrong: Number one: Never travel with a Tuk Tuk (those are the half open tricycles), not just because of the scourching heat and air that is apparent when stuck in a trafficjam, and also the type of weather for example when one is travelling through the rain in the stinking and loud vehicle which is open on three sides leaving one without much protection. And not just because you feel every hole in the road which really hurts ones back and when one is over 1 meter 70 tall and can’t see much of the town because ones head is just below the ceiling. Not because in case of an accident one has next to no portection at all. The thing is, the damn things don’t have a meter. For a BKK taxi driver who takes an unsuspecting Farang on a trip of maybe even 100 metres, this is an invitation to commit legal street robbery. If the price hasn’t been agreed upon beforehand, then a fantasy price will subsequently be named and have to be payed. Then it is ones own fault and will as I said, have to be paid, it won’t even be worth reporting it to the tourist police because there is nothin g one can do about it.

Maybe I’m being a bit unjust to one or the other Tuk Tuk driver, but most of them have specialised on tourists. Even when they take Thais with baggage up to the roof for the normal price, Farangs are ripped off, even if one agrees about the price but one doesn’t really know what the trip would have normally cost, the cards are stacked against one. One can roughly expect to pay four or five times as much as the trip would normally cost. Many Tuk Tuk drivers have specialised on providing tourists with guided tours to temples and other places of interest, and to lurk upon their victims. Or down the Sukhumvit Road, for example they like to stand on the corner of Soi 5 or 7, there where a great deal of Farang pass. Be alarmed straight away if they talk to you mainly with the words “Hello Sir! How are you today, sir?” or even “my friend”. “Where you go” is another popular thing, one is regularly offered to be taken to ones destination, of course for only 10 Baht.

On the journey there are a lot of excuses made and things tried on like, I have to fill up, or being dropped off at Chinese souvenir shops, or “massage sir? Veeeeery nice ladies sir” with the widest smile you have ever seen and a nicely laid out brochure of a massage parlour with lots of nice photos of the “artists” that work there. The 10 Baht are just a false pretence, these tricks serve to enable the driver to cash in on a commission because nobody, and I mean nobody gets anywhere for just 10 Baht. One also spends a lot of time being dragged around to place where one didn’t want to go to in the first place.

With a few restrictions, this also applies to the motorbike taxi. Especially the price: Always agree on a price beforehand: The journey from NANA to Patpong costs about 70 Baht on a bike. In a taxi with a meter the same stretch would have cost only 50 Baht, but the price is still correct. On a bike it is possible to save quite a bit of time because at certain times, one can spend an hour in a traffic jam on this short stretch. Don’t forget that it is a lot more dangerous on a motorbike (accident wise) than in a car. And those who know about the reports about what they do with accident victims in BKK, or should I maybe say what they DON’T do, should give it a good bit of thought beforehand. As an alternative to the heavy traffic, the SKY TRAIN comes into question, a future like train with magnetic suspension built by Siemens. It has its own carriageway above the streets of BKK. NANA to Patpong costs 25 Baht, air conditioning, clean, safe. One connection (ask at the counter or take a look at the timetable) and within 10 minutes at the latest you reach your destination. The sky train crosses the newly constructed subway a few times. Here a link to a nicely laid out page from BTS (all stations, prices and durations):

Sky train/BTS

Ok! What’s the best way to travel in BKK? It’s simple, just fish one of the numerous “taximeter” taxis out of the dense flowing traffic (they have the appropriate sign on top, can’t miss them) and let yourself be taken to your destination in an air conditioned atmosphere, and cheap as well. The taxis are mainly yellow – green or red/blue. The paint is the best thing about the whole car. Why fish out of the flowing traffic? The taxi drivers must in a way, somehow be closely related to the Tuk Tuk drivers mentioned above, They like to park in front of hotels, and when one leaves the hotel they rush up asking; “taxi sir?” Don’t hesitate to say no because one can bet ones bottom dollar that an extorting price will be named, or when entering the taxi, the meter is not switched on which, and as mentioned above will lead to a fantasy price.

By holding up ones hand one is able to fish one out of the traffic, taxis have a small red light at the front, if it is lit up it means that the taxi is free and will stop. Most of the taxi drivers can’t speak a word of English; some have never even had a Farang as a passenger before. There are not really that many of us in BKK at all. But the destination is understood. As soon as one has entered the nice cool taxi, one should make sure that the meter has been switched on, otherwise one should point to the clock and say “taximeter”. If you receive the stupid answer that it is broken, then one has most certainly met a trickster. One immediately tells the driver to stop and one leaves the taxi without saying a word and of course without paying. One looks out for the next taxi which more than likely will come to a halt just behind you. If the driver does decide that the meter works, then all is ok…

Taxi drivers don’t have it very easy in BKK, they rent the cars mainly for 12 hours at a fix rate, and they have to earn that first plus the petrol money. It’s not uncommon that the police want their share as well… Taxi drivers really love the cops. Some try to “earn” 100 -200 Baht extra each day, the minimum daily wage in Thailand is 180 Baht, that’s 4 – 5 USD. It’s not normal to give a tip and they aren’t expected, that doesn’t means that one has to wait for them to fork out the last 5 Baht change. The same applies to restaurants; Thais don’t normally give any more than a 10 Baht tip. By the way, it is extremely important before entering a taxi that one has loose change with them, That’s another well liked trick: the driver claims that he can’t change a 100 Baht note in the hope that the “rich” but stupid Farang will let him keep the rest as a tip. Just in case one has no small change then one will have to get some at the destination. It’s best to have a supply in ones pocket.

Most of the girls come from northeast Thailand, quite a poor area with a lot of paddy fields, the Isaan. Apart from agriculture there are not many other means of earning money, which is the reason why a lot of the younger people try their luck in the cities.

For example, in Pattaya the hotels, restaurants and supermarkets etc, are despairingly looking for workers and that for above average wages. Of course it is easier, more rewarding and nicer for the girls to earn their money in the sex business, or as the case may be, in a bar. Celebrating and partying agrees with the Thai mentality, some only work until they have enough money for the next day before taking a break. This is one reason why a lot of capital in Thailand is in the hands of the Chinese.

Most girls are “recruited” by girlfriends who already have a job in a bar. Of course, when they visit home they like to show their “status symbols”, for example, expensive mobile phone, gold jewellery, brand name clothes etc. This makes the girls at home envious and the bars are always looking for new girls – younger sisters and friends will then want to get involved – and it’s better than hanging around the village doing nothing at all.

Some set off to Bangkok or Pattaya to get a job in a supermarket or laundry etc. or as a chambermaid in a hotel. After a short time they realise how easily the bar girls are earning many times the amount they themselves do; not forgetting the fun factor. The girls in the bars often form groups of friends, are always together and have the feeling that this is like a large family. After a while the girls in the supermarkets etc. quite often move from their strenuous job to a bar, is understandable really.

The girls’ service

Prostitution is illegal in Thailand, even if this is a shock to you, it’s true. However, nobody needs to be worried about this, especially us, it’s quite normal and nobody bothers about it at all.

Of course there are a lot of stupid prejudices with regard to the girls in Thailand. For example, that the poor things are forced to prostitute by pimps and that the pimps cash in, and, that they are exploited by their clients. Apart from this they are only children and sex tourists are disgusting paedophile pigs. All wrong. There are no pimps in Thailand, the girls carry out there pleasant work on a voluntary basis and they are all of age. If anyone happens to be exploited, then we are.

Of course it is true that to us Asian women look younger than they really are, especially for the inexperienced eye. Sometimes even a 30 year old mother with three children is thought to be about 14 years of age. Don’t worry, all Thais have an ID card with which it is possible to find out how old they are (more later).

The service: Whilst here at home about 99.5% of that what one becomes for money does not earn the expression GFS (girlfriend sex), in Thailand it is quite normal and standard. The girls give us the pleasant impression that they are our girlfriend. There are no restrictions at all such as the poor old bothered client here experiences and, obviously due to the lack of alternatives here at home has to be accepted without complaint. One gets depressed when one reads in forums about paying for sex where one lives, how some are made fools of and how the piss is taken. When one then reads how when saying goodbye in the Frankfurt station area or in St. Pauli in Hamburg, that some are given an extra kiss for their money, it brings tears to one’s eyes.

Of course one must pay no extra for the girl to get undressed (no women’s lib here) etc. On the contrary, everything is permitted such as with one’s own girlfriend. But, don’t expect all of them to like anal sex or other unusual practices, one should sort things like that out beforehand. Nevertheless, such things never cost extra. Either the girl is willing or you look for another, or as the case may be, one does without. On the other hand many things just happen without discussion, especially when spending a few days with a girl. Just take things easy.

All in all when talking about the service and especially the girls, Thailand is a men’s paradise. Just let yourself be surprised – it cannot be compared with here, it is much much better, a completely different world.

Massages

Thai Massages at first don’t have anything to do with sex (except for body massages) the traditional Thai massage (and related massages) are much liked amongst tourists, even I like one, two or three hours massage each week.

As usual one can get such a massage in one of the numerous massage parlours (signs on almost every corner). It is also possible to have a masseuse come to your hotel room, either one orders one directly at a massage parlour by making an appointment or one orders one through the hotel reception, which in general costs 100 – 200 Baht more (per hour). The hotel receives a commission for getting the masseuse to come around. If you order one yourself it will then have nothing to do with the hotel. Massages are also offered down at the beaches, I don’t like this because everything is sandy and all around you can watch.

Quite often you can look through the window and watch customers sitting loungers, for example having a foot massage. Keep away from these parlours, uncomfortable and too public, a bit like an event for stupid people. Arabs like this sort of thing.

A rough difference between Thai and oil massages.

Thai massage:

First of all you ask about the price at the entrance if not shown on a sign. One also asks who will perform the massage if it matters to you whether the masseuse is good looking or not. If you don’t ask you risk being passed on from the good looking girl at the entrance to the old lady with wrestlers’ fingers at the back of the place. Well, a one hour massage in Pattaya should not cost more than 200 Baht. Take a two hour massage; one hour is too short to relax.

Quite often you will have your feet washed first, you sit on a chair and the masseuse dips your feet in a bowl of soapy water.

One then follows the masseuse to a room, quite often upstairs, which is divided into small cabins with the use of curtains, sometimes gypsum board. One is led into one of the cabins, the curtain is closed from the outside and one is able to get changed without being disturbed: One is provided with a wide floppy pair of “pyjama” trousers and normally a shirt to match. One lies down on the covered mattress, which is mainly on the ground. The masseuse will then ask whether you like it rough or gentle. She will then start massaging, first of all your feet and then up towards your head. Depending on who massages you a conversation will be started. You tell the girl your name, where you come from, the reason for your visit and whether you are married or have a Thai woman. I myself am always polite and give them this information, but in general I just want a massage and shut my eyes. Often one is given a cup of green tea, which one can sip now and again.

There are great differences between both the way the massage is carried out and the ability of the “actresses”. I myself am not all that bothered about the girls looks, because all I want is a good massage. I can look at good looking girls later on in the bars. The older women are quite often very good at massaging and know what they are doing; this is something that quite often does not apply to the younger girls – how should they know? Once you have found your masseuse you will find that you will stay with her and book her again. Maybe the next time you can make an appointment with her for a massage in your hotel room. Don’t forget to take the parlours business card with you and note the name of the girl, then you will be able to arrange things the next time over the phone.

After getting dressed again you have to pay. You pay on the ground floor before leaving. It is normal to give the masseuse a tip; I always give 100 Baht for two hours. The girls only have a low basic wage and need the tip. The masseuse will hold the door open for you and says thanks.

Oil massage:

The difference here is that the massage is not carried out “dry” but with the use of oil and maybe with various scents. Apart from that one is naked with a towel only being draped over ones backside. This type of massage is normally gentle and one is not kneaded as much as during a Thai massage. Give it a try. Oil massages are a little more expensive, normally 300 Baht for an hour. One is able to take a shower after the massage. This is more comfortable in one’s own hotel room, but one should put a towel on the bed beforehand to stop the bed getting oily.

Sex during a Massage:

Yes, this does happen quite often. It is not uncommon that one is gradually “turned on”. Just by coincidence her elbow touches your private parts or during an oil massage certain parts are massaged von behind part where mum would not even think of. I know from my own experience: Such things can lead to one getting a lob-on ;-)   One can experience all sorts of things in a massage parlour, or nothing all. I myself go for a massage; sex is available at other places. You don’t buy your milk at the butchers do you? On the other hand, if one does get randy then one should not be reluctant. A lot depends on the parlour, in some of them it is a basic principle that nothing like that happens, in others it is normal. I find 500 for a blow job ok; I never pay more than that in a massage parlour. I have even had an anal job for that much, was in Patong (Phuket). Everything is a case of luck and coincidence. Quite often they will offer you a hand job, not my sort of thing, can have a wank on my own and better and cheaper at that. The girls understand.

Something else about safety:

This has to do with massages and short times in some bars. Always keep your eyes on your stuff, even when you go to the bog or for a shower. I do it this way: I have cash, mobile, cam etc. in my trouser pockets. I roll them up starting at the top; this means that nobody can slip their hand into a pocket. I leave my trousers lying in a corner near my head. In general nothing happens in the massage parlours, 99% of the ST girls are also correct. But “an open door can tempt a saint” so don’t just hang your stuff on the wall when it is possible that someone my reach over and grab it. If you go for a shower simply take your trousers with you as they are, that’s normal and will not make people wonder why. It is not possible to judge what sort of people are around, other tourists, whores, delivery services etc. etc.

The pics below are actually from Koh Chang (see “Pattaya Party”), White Sands Beach was very expensive but the ambience super, this is where I had the best massage I have ever had (no sex). Normally the massages are nothing special.